Mr Mahatma--who is a Mr in real life--lives in the valleys of Southern California with his wife, a herd of Dears, and an impressive collection of books. Pnorny!
He is reachable at:
littlemrmahatma@yahoo.com

All writings are copyrighted 2003-2008 and trademarked: Little Mr. Mahatma

tBlog Mirror

Some fun links:
Little Miss Attila - polar opposite and origin of LMM.

Critical Sites:
Dr. Forbush Thinks
Slashdot
Games Slashdot
UserFriendly
James Randi
Snopes
Home of the Underdogs
The Sun Online

For those generous in spirit, heart, and wallet:

I think I've figured out why I dislike Bush so much. It's not just that he's a shifty-eyed, smirking, weasel-faced lier or that's he's trying to be something he's not (namely an elected President), it's that he's missing a true sidekick. Bush needs someone in the spotlight with him to enhance his image but not be the star. Someone who makes Bush look more like the Cowboy George hero image he's trying to project. Face it, Dick Cheney just doesn't cut it as his sidekick and cohort in arms. Cheney is too much like Sidney Greenstreet, a quiet threat sitting in the shadows of a smoky Moroccan cafe, while pondering his next move. Bush deserves better.

And so I've taken it upon myself to prepare the following list of candidates. The winner to be appointed as official sidekick to Cowboy George.

Now many of you will complain that many of these candidates are dead or fictitious. Yes, that is so, and that makes them even more appropriate for the job. They mirror the intellect and position of Cowboy George. And so without ado...

Walter Brennan - The limp, the shoulders, the look, the legend. The problem with Walter as the sidekick is that he could easily overshadow the main star. But a better rummy sidekick could not be found.

"Are we gonna invade, George, huh? Are we?"

"Now, Dingo, have you been hitting the sauce again? Nipping at my private stash?"

"Jus' a little t'get me through the mornin'. You know how it is..."

"Yes, I know. And, yes, Dingo we're going to invade!"

"Great! That calls fer a celebration, don't it? Jus' a little...?"

"Sure, Dingo, go ahead...that Dingo...!"

Slim Pickens - A true cowboy's sidekick. Slim would add a certain credence to Cowboy George as a real cowboy. Plus Slim's ability to ride herd on a nuclear warhead is unmatched by the other candidates.

Porky Pig - His credits as a sidekick to Hopalong Daffy are impecc..impecc..sterling. More importantly he's the only sidekick candidate with worse speaking abilities than Cowboy George. By comparison Cowboy George will sound like a Shakespearean actor.

"We will...display...to the world...the justice...that Hussein...denied...to so...many people."

"You tell them, Pres..Pres..Pres..you tell them Cowboy George!"

Mongo - He'll work for beans. Mongo's proclivity for gas mirrors Cowboy George's proclivity for oil. However Mongo's intellect may prove threatening to Cowboy George.

And still many more worthy candidates: "Gabby" Hayes, Pat Buttram, "Smiley" Burnette, "Pappy" Lynn to name a few. Feel free to submit your own choices.

Whomever gets the coveted position of sidekick to Cowboy George will find an acting challenge and a new world open to conquest. Yee-haw!

Well, like most predictions, my prediction that Hussein and/or bin Laden would be captured in July or August proved wrong. I had figured that capturing one of them around July or August would provide a late boost for Bush in his quest to become a real elected President. Instead Hussein's recent capture provides so much more.

It takes the wind out of Howard Dean's sail. Too much newsprint was devoted to Dean. Now it'll focus back on Bush. And it will focus on Bush and not on the illegalities of our invasion of Iraq, not on the illegalities of the post-war no-bid contracts, and certainly not on the destruction of our environment and economy. Back to how heroic our troops are and were in a war so...unnecessary. C, mon, if it were a necessary war against terrorism why aren't we invading Saudi Arabia? Oh yeah, money. Iraq was relatively easy pickin's compared to going against Saudi Arabia.

Instead it's back to the wartime - Rah! Rah! Aren't we a great country - Love it or leave it! - If you don't support the "President" you must be a terrorist! - mentality that people of intelligence find so repulsive. Back to looking at Bush trying desperately not to look smug, while strutting around as if he'd caught Hussein himself. Back to listening to the warmongers, mostly Republican, crow about how this is all a good thing. That we got rid of an evil person, all the while there are plenty more evil people running countries that we don't seem to be doing much about. Many of these countries don't have oil either. Draw your own conclusion.

In any case, as Hussein faces some sort of trial, consider these questions:

If Hussein proved such a dangerous threat to the U.S. and perhaps the world shouldn't he go on trial at an International Court? We went into Iraq because of, according to the U.S. Government, Hussein posed as a real threat with his "Weapons of Mass Destruction". In that case, put him on trial for such. Or does "lack of evidence" mean something?

The U.S. Government talks about justice for Hussein. Are we going to try him according to our judicial system or the one in Iraq? If we allow the Iraqis to try him, will we stand by as they pretty much take one look at him, say "Guilty!", and take him out to the football field to be shot in public? Or will we demand a long trial before a more private shooting? Will we do justice by the Iraqis or what's best for the U.S Governments image?

Will we now move the 125,000 troops to Afghanistan so that we can really search for bin Laden? After all, there is stronger evidence that bin Laden did something directly against the U.S. people, so he should get the greater focus - right? Or will we stay in Iraq to protect the oil, I mean, continue the fight against terrorism? Maybe we could bring the troops back here so they can search for the killer of Nicole Simpson...

Bush for Blair

Can we please swap Bush for Tony Blair? They're both fairly reprehensible as far as politicians go but, at least, I don't mind listening to Blair. He speaks English eloquently. Bush strangles English brutally. I'm tired of Bush and his 3-word sentences, no word over 2 syllables. And his - pause - reading of - pause - speeches at - pause - a pace appropriate - pause - for a Kindergartener. I expect Bush to read with his finger pointing to each word while a cabinet member stand behind him to help with some of the more difficult pronunciations.

That's why we get such great sayings like:

"Go get them!" or "We got him!" coming out of the Bush administration. Because he's such a simple person they assume the rest of the country is as well.

Next election, any candidate lacking grey matter betwixt the ears gets knocked off the ballot automatically. That leaves....ummmm....

Handle This!

I like Ebay, perhaps a little too much. I like the convenience and the excitement of getting a great deal on something. I hate getting outbid in the final 20 seconds of an auction but I've done that to other people and fair is fair.

One thing really irks me beyond all reasonable measure and that is those sellers who charge a little (or a lot) too much for shipping and then ship as cheaply as possible, pocketing the difference. I've had that happen to me twice. Both times I sent emails to the sellers asking about the shipping - I mean, hell, if I pay enough for something to be shipped Priority then the expectation is that the item will be shipped Priority - and both times I got replies that the costs were to cover handling. What the hell? How can you ship an item and not handle it? What excessive handling is involved with putting a book or game in a (free from the Post Office) Priority box and mailing it? Hell, you can order FREE priority mail boxes online and get them delivered to your house or business.

"Handling" is nothing more than a ripoff.

Arguably I should have contacted the seller during the auction to find out exactly how the item will be shipped so some blame does go to me. But a ripoff is still a ripoff.

SUV Warning

I drive a Suburban - yep, a big old, gas guzzling, urban tank. But I can justify it - I have a large family. But the point of this rant is actually a warning to all the drivers of small zippy and/or nice, expensive automobiles.

When you see a nice car length gap in front of an SUV or urban tank like my 'Burb curb your need to zoom in and take it. Unlike your BMW, Lexus, or Mercedes, my Suburban can't stop on a dime. If you cut in front of me and hit the brakes, you will be a smear on my front bumper. That gap in front of me is my braking space. I need the room. You take that space at your own risk.

Oh yeah, that toggle on the left hand side of your steering wheel is called a turn signal. You use to signal your intention when switching lanes. Considering how expensive a BMW, Mercedes, and Lexus car can get I'd assume that they include working turn signals. Use them.

Lastly, the far LEFT lane usually has drivers who go a bit ABOVE the speed limit. If you must drive well below the speed limit, do so in the other lanes. I promise we will "Ooooh!" and "Aaaah!" at whatever you are driving.

A Sexual Jesus

After I finished reading Dan Brown's The Da Vinci Code I got into a consipiracy mood and started snooping online for all things Leonardo Da Vinci. Eventually I cam across:

Leonardo and Mary which led me to

Magdalene and the Fourth Gospel

After reading Mr. Jusino's essay I got to thinking about Jesus and sexuality. Simply: Did Jesus have sex?

Why wouldn't he? If Jesus was Jewish and a Rabbi he certainly would have been married and likely pursuing a family. Families are central and sacred to Judaism. In addition, he may have had "divine" intercourse at the Temple.

Consider Mary Magdalene, the favored and beloved disciple. She is a constant companion. Why couldn't she be a lover of Jesus without having to be a prostitute?

Was Jesus bisexual? Hearing that Peter was jealous of Jesus loving Mary more sounds like a lovers spat.

Gay Jesus?

That Jesus had sex is probable - he *was* human. He ate, he slept, he lived, he died. He prayed, he taught, he contemplated. He fornicated, he pissed, he shitted - blunt but truthful. Amazing how someone human can be recreated into something they were likely not.

As the year quickly races to a close here are some enjoyments that I indulged in in my limited free time:

Flogging Molly - "Drunken Lullabies" Flogging Molly rocks! Sure, some bands had some great songs in the past year but this is one of those rare CDs where every single song is memorable.

Flogging Molly - "Swagger" This is their first CD and while not as polished as "Drunken Lullabies" it is still recommended.

Perez-Reverts - "The Fencing Master", Perez-Reverts - "The Club Dumas",
Perez-Reverts - "The Seville Communion" - These three books are what I consider the best works by a great, enjoyable author. Highly recommended!

John Steinbeck - "The Grapes of Wrath" - My favorite book by my favorite author. I re-read this again and again picked up something new. Forget Faulkner and Hemingway. Steinbeck is The Master.

Dan Brown - "The Da Vinci Code" - Sure, it was predictable as to who done it but still an enjoyable read.

Dan Brown - "Angels & Demons" - The first books of his that I read. Good read and in some ways better than "The Da Vinci Code".

Rowling - "Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (Book 5)" - Like most everyone else on this freaking planet I read it. And I enjoyed. My kids enjoyed it. So when's book 6 coming out?

There lots more but my memory is quickly fading. I didn't touch on all the favorite DVDs and didn't bother with computer games. Besides, pick up a good book, curl up in a corner with good light, and lose yourself.

Subtle irony I think. Way back when in Elementary School, this time of year we'd be rehearsing for the Christmas Pageant. Yes, back then it was blatantly called the Christmas Pageant and this was at a public school on the West Coast. But in 6th grade things changed and to appease the Jewish kids the Christmas Pageant included a token Chanukah song. Being Jewish I wasn't appeased. Of course, I didn't care for the Pageant at all.

Move forward through time and now we have "Holiday Pageants" or "Winter Pageants". And so in the name of political correctness we've moved back to generic celebrations of the seasonal holidays. Back to the essentially pagan origins. I love it and am appeased.

Cuban Cigars

A close friend of mine took a mini-mini-vacation down to Tijuana. Coming back into the States he was caught by the Border Police. He was trying to bring in cuban cigars and passing through the metal detectors the aluminum holders set off the alarms. Did they give him a full body cavity search? Did they beat him with canes on the soles of his feet?

No, they let him back in the States with the cigars. After all, Gov. Arnie smokes cuban cigars...

And speaking of Cuba, it's time we made it a protectorate. They need our money. We need their cigars. How the hell can we be blasted for Imperialism when we can't even annex a crud little island right off our shores. Bush needs to get his priorities straight. 'Free' Cuba now!

More On Bush

Sounds like "Moron Bush", doesn't it? I'm predicting here and now that around August either Hussein or bin Laden (or both) will be caught by U.S. Forces. I chose that time frame because it's close to election time but not too close nor too far. It's just about right for Bush to milk the event and come off looking like some sort of hero.

So why didn't he visit the troops in Afghanistan?

Sure feels that way. So many plans and not enough time to fulfill any of them. There's major housework with major expenses, minor housework with minor expenses, and work in general. So many creative projects yet to be started - like collecting, recording, and editing the stories I make up for my kids. So many projects not yet finished. And in the mix is this blog.

I'm still not sold on blogging. I write just to vent which means that when I blog there is an issue. My blogging, therefore, is argumentative and confrontationial. Whether it makes for interesting reading depends in part on my skill as an author and whether my writing approaches some state of lucidity.

But as I drove to work the other day I got to "figurin'" that many folks blog nearly daily on just plain old events. Does that make for interesting reading? It doesn't for me.

Monday: Woke up. Kicked the dog. Stumbled into the bathroom. Peed in the sink. Shaved. Took shower. Ate breakfast AND read the paper. Yelled at kids. Took kids to school. Went to work. Woke up from work. Picked up kids. Greeted wife. Ate dinner. Watched TV. Fell asleep.

Tuesday-Friday: same as Monday.

This type of blogging is boring. And right along with it are those blogs that mention nothing more than reading (and linking) to other people's blogs. Blog sex. Big whoop. Mutual hit masturbation. Snooze. How is this different than having a plain old web site with a bunch of links?

Is there such a thing a blog purity, like a gonzo-style blog where you record not what you are doing every moment but how you interpret what's happening to you? Can there be something more to blogging than the pressure to maintain the damn thing? Is there a true underlying purpose beyond that what we claim? I blog usually when I must rant but is there more to it?

While I think about all this, I'll copy Little Miss Attila's desperation tactics for hits/money: Paris Hilton, sex, camels, amateur videos, Bush, Iraq, Hard Place, Linux, XP, Oscars, pnorny. If you donate to my Paypal account I *MAY* post naughty pictures. Donate frequently and graciously.